Internet Tubes

I can't decide which is better: Andrew Mason or Carol Bartz's farewell letters

Andrew Mason (https://www.jottit.com/v5wux/)

(This is for Groupon employees, but I'm posting it publicly since it will leak anyway)

People of Groupon,

After four and a half intense and wonderful years as CEO of Groupon, I've decided that I'd like to spend more time with my family. Just kidding - I was fired today. If you're wondering why... you haven't been paying attention. From controversial metrics in our S1 to our material weakness to two quarters of missing our own expectations and a stock price that's hovering around one quarter of our listing price, the events of the last year and a half speak for themselves. As CEO, I am accountable.

You are doing amazing things at Groupon, and you deserve the outside world to give you a second chance. I'm getting in the way of that. A fresh CEO earns you that chance. The board is aligned behind the strategy we've shared over the last few months, and I've never seen you working together more effectively as a global company - it's time to give Groupon a relief valve from the public noise.

For those who are concerned about me, please don't be - I love Groupon, and I'm terribly proud of what we've created. I'm OK with having failed at this part of the journey. If Groupon was Battletoads, it would be like I made it all the way to the Terra Tubes without dying on my first ever play through. I am so lucky to have had the opportunity to take the company this far with all of you. I'll now take some time to decompress (FYI I'm looking for a good fat camp to lose my Groupon 40, if anyone has a suggestion), and then maybe I'll figure out how to channel this experience into something productive.

If there's one piece of wisdom that this simple pilgrim would like to impart upon you: have the courage to start with the customer. My biggest regrets are the moments that I let a lack of data override my intuition on what's best for our customers. This leadership change gives you some breathing room to break bad habits and deliver sustainable customer happiness - don't waste the opportunity!

I will miss you terribly.

Love,

Andrew

 

Or Carol Bartz's resignation email (http://www.zerohedge.com/news/carol-bartz-farewell-letter)

RE: I’ve Just Been Fired

To all,

I am very sad to tell you that I’ve just been fired over the phone by Yahoo’s Chairman of the Board. It has been my pleasure to work with all of you and I wish you only the best going forward.

Carol

Sent from my iPad

Regardless of which one, getting fired sucks. 

This is happening now: http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/19eqzm/iam_hadi_partovi_cofounder_of_codeorg_here_with/

Awesome to see our hard work pay off. Go @cloudfoundry team!. http://gigaom.com/2013/02/28/cloudbees-offers-cloud-foundry-integration/

@CloudFoundry now has Jenkins CI courtesy of @cloudbees. Woot! http://t.co/wzBI4HoU9N

DevOps 101: web caching

Caching: Three main types of caching enable websites to operate efficiently: in memory data caches, local asset caches, and global asset caching. An in memory data cache (e.g. memcache for session state) is an optimum way to store state between HTTP requests, which in themselves are part of a stateless protocol. Next a local asset cache/proxy immediately in front of a website can store images and other static files for quick retrieval without the web servers having to process the associated requests; such tools include Stingray, Varnish, and Squid. Lastly a global asset cache (e.g. content delivery networks or CDNs such as Akamai, CDNetworks, Limelight, Fast.ly) will perform similar duties as the before mentioned local asset cache, but will store the cached files even closer to the end users. Additionally these global asset caches (CDNs) dynamically choose the best internet routes based on each users location.

Source: InfoQ

This is the only way Justin Bieber can be enjoyed

So easy to add your own "how tos" docs and wiki knowledge to the #cloudfoundry community via Github: https://github.com/mrdavidlaing/cf-docs-contrib/wiki

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Hadoop Is Growing Up

For many, Hadoop has become much more than just an interesting data management technology -- it's starting to be seen as the potential strategic successor to the familiar relational database world.�

It's the platform where the next generation of big data applications will be built.

Along those lines, EMC's Greenplum division -- now part of the nascent Pivotal Initiative -- has announced a considerable suite of extensions and enhancements to the increasingly popular Hadoop environment.�

via chucksblog.emc.com

Pivotal HD 100 times faster query thank Cloudera Impala: http://www.wired.com/wiredenterprise/2013/02/pivotal-hd-greenplum-emc/

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And the Oscar goes to... trip

North Shore of Lake Tahoe - panoramic facing south. This is where I want to live!

Best advice for tech companies. Teach all your employees how to sell

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via techcrunch.com

Friends and wine. Just love Tattle and Dave

Nice day

@darian314 can we do this with your mini?

Now THAT is a desk!

source: http://gizmodo.com/5967661/where-is-this-mind+blowing-antique-transforming-%20desk-hiding-its-autobot-logo

Los Angeles

TimeLAX 01 from iVideoMaking on Vimeo.

You know you're working in the right place when your boss @wattersjames is retweeted by @API_Borat

#cloudfoundry roadmap? Sure thing, just go here: http://cloudfoundry.github.com/docs/roadmap.html

Douchetard Parking. Thanks Florida!

Cloud Foundry in Japan via NTT... and they're CORE compatible! WOOT (http://blog.cloudfoundry.com/2013/02/13/ntt-communications-worlds-leading-telecom-joins-cloud-foundry-core/)

Hey @googlechrome did you guys do something to the latest Chrome on Mac, because now it's completely borked!

Texas!! Really??? Does the world REALLY need a machine gun camouflaged as a flashlight?

This girl is the real "cookie monster"

don't do this at home

The "damnyouautocorrect" of Xcode. Oh Apple why must you make life so difficult? http://www.textfromxcode.com/

Phone problems suck. Come on Android work!!!